Maffeo Sutton Park

The heart of Nanaimo

A delightful seaside park
Maffeo Sutton Park

A delightful seaside park downtown Nanaimo is the focal point of this city. It was the first place my late husband brought me to in 2007 after we met. Just a few blocks from his condo, we hung out there all the time, walking along the seawall, listening to buskers, eating raspberry cheesecake ice cream, and attending all kinds of outdoor concerts. We always ran into people we knew.

Memories of park people

Now, fourteen years later, although still a favourite place, a hollow feeling lurks. Sid is gone, as are most of the people we knew at the park. I was surprised to see one lady recently, who has been there all along. She used to sit on a bench, the focus of attention in a circle of men. Once Sid told me she brought egg sandwiches to share, and it was the best egg sandwich he’d ever eaten. Now she can only drive there and enjoy the view from her car. She’s had cancer for over a year, and can’t walk any more.

I remember another lady who passed away several years ago. She used to float through the park in long summery floral gowns, her flowing brunette hair streaming behind. Always happy, sharing cheerful snatches of conversation. As her Alzheimer’s worsened, one evening we found her sitting on a bench holding hands with a man who wasn’t her husband. He told us he’d just got out of prison. He was sitting in the park feeling dejected, when along came this angel. Squeezing his hand, she said, “Wait till you meet my husband! He’s the real angel!” That was the last time we saw her.

A cacophony of music

Weird and wonderful buskers used to sing and play at posts every few feet apart. Wailing Willy is still around, but I haven’t seen him down there lately, thrumming on a guitar and bellowing out songs in his straw hat. He’s famous in Canada and has often travelled around with his wife putting on concerts. Now that the COVID-19 restrictions are easing, I hope the keyboard player, and the trumpet player and his dad, who play oldies return. Once I was sitting on a bench enjoying the keyboard, when the musician remarked to me, “I’m just glad that blasted bagpipe player isn’t up there on the bluff competing with me this evening.” I chuckled inside, but didn’t tell him the bagpipe player was a dear old friend of mine from our teens in Vancouver. I kind of like the bagpipes.

I still walk my dog in this delightful seaside park full of memories. The cool ocean breeze refreshes my spirit. I hope to run into someone I know, or even exchange a few words with someone new. It’s the best!

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The Ghost and Mrs. Muir, by R. A. Dick, 1945, Vintage Books (Random House)

A widow is befriended by the ghost of a sea captain.
The Ghost and Mrs. Muir

This book was the last present to me from my husband. I saved it to read until now, half a year since his passing. He watched the movie late one night last March, after I’d already gone to bed, and loved it so much that he went to Chapters and ordered me the book. I knew it held significance to him, so I postponed reading it until a time when I was able to take it in and think about the reasons Sid wanted to share it with me.

Shortly after Sid ordered the book, Canada was suddenly shut down due to COVID-19. At the same time, his physical condition was deteriorating rapidly from pancreatic cancer. So our concentration was on these things and we almost forgot about the book. Finally when covid restrictions lightened up they phoned a couple of times to say the book had arrived at Chapters, and I took a few minutes away from tending my dear to go pick it up.

I remember watching the sitcom of The Ghost and Mrs. Muir a few times in the sixties. But the book seemed more serious. Did you know ‘muir’ means ‘the sea’? And Mrs. Muir’s first name, Lucy, or Lucia, means light. She was a little woman whose husband had recently died. She moved to a small town by the sea with her two young children to establish her own life, away from controlling in-laws. An introvert by nature, here she could live a quiet life.

She found an affordable house to rent, offered cheap because it was haunted by a sea captain who used to own it. The captain became her friend. Was he real or a figment of her imagination? At any rate, it was his idea that she write a book.

I can see why Sid wanted me to read this story. I totally relate to Mrs. Muir. Like her, I love living near the ocean. It restores my soul. Like Mrs. Muir, there was a time in my life when I needed to find myself, away from others. Like her, I enjoy the simple things of life, like walking with my dog or puttering in a garden with a few roses. I also enjoy working on a book I’m writing.

Plus there’s the theme of being a widow. In my case I wonder if Sid was thinking he would come and converse with me like the captain and Mrs. Muir did. Indeed I have found comfort in talking to Sid over the last six months since he passed. Whether he really hears me or not is kind of beside the point. I recall things he used to say, and things we enjoyed together. And cry because I miss his physical presence. But I haven’t forgotten that we were often at odds with one another, just the way Mrs. Muir was with the captain. You’ll have to read it to see what I mean. I’m glad to know I’m not the only person who gets cranky like that.

This book reminds me of one I recently read–Love, Anthony, by Lisa Genova. Also about a young mother living by the sea. Also with a theme of enjoying the simplicity of life without trying to please others by doing and accomplishing things all the time.

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